


Void

by FanGirlAndProudOfIt



Series: Nova [2]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Canon Compliant, Canonical Character Death, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-05
Updated: 2016-01-05
Packaged: 2018-05-11 23:11:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 319
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5645293
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FanGirlAndProudOfIt/pseuds/FanGirlAndProudOfIt
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This was supposed to fix everything.</p><p>It was supposed to sever all ties. Cut off his connection to the light. Eliminate that exhausting pull. Lead him further down his path to the Dark Side.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Void

**Void**

This was supposed to fix everything.

It was supposed to sever all ties. Cut off his connection to the light. Eliminate that exhausting _pull_ . Lead him further down his path to the Dark Side. _Destroy Ben_.

He’d struggled. He’d _agonized_ over this choice; this final moment of reckoning. Had known, always, that this is how it had to be. It _had_ to be Han Solo.

No matter how he fought to banish it from his awareness, his father’s presence was always there, clear as day, bright as the sun. A sun whose gravity pulled him toward its light.

His father was his tether to the light. So that tether had to be cut. Han Solo had to be his sacrifice.

And at first, he thought it worked. The light outside went out, signalling the First Order’s victory, and he ran Han Solo through with his lightsaber.

“Thank you.”

He’d won. Or so he thought.

Han Solo, his father, whom he had just _impaled_ , reached for him, and with his last act, cradled Ben’s face in his hand one last time before falling into the abyss.

Ben thought he’d known what it was to be torn apart. He thought he’d known regret. He was wrong. _This_ was regret. _This_ was what it was for your insides to rip themselves to shreds, screaming at you that _you_ _could have gone home_.

His father’s shining light faded and went out, leaving an aching empty _void_ in its wake.

He’d cut the tether. But the _longing_ remained. Remained and heightened because now his father was gone, murdered, _extinguished_ by _his hand_.

His heart was in pieces, still grasping at the spot in his awareness where his father had shone so brightly.

Then he was shot. By Chewie.

 _Chewie_.

And he knew.

No matter how much he wanted to go home, home was gone.

Ben Solo was lost.

Kylo Ren remained.

With nothing.

**Author's Note:**

> Well this wasn't meant to become a series. What can you do. Saw it a fourth time and couldn't help myself. I have plans now. Plans for tears. Yaaaaaaaaay.


End file.
